Thursday, October 4, 2018

Snapshot - Fall 2018


Lily regularly asks me when she can walk the mile to school alone in our urban neighborhood, when she can start babysitting, when she can have her own computer, and of course when she can have her own phone.  Even though the answer to all the questions is not yet, I do have to say that Lily shows quite a bit of maturity at 9 years old.  She's very independent and on top of what her day's schedule looks like and plans for it accordingly (what to wear, what to pack, extra food).  Gosh, she even knows my own schedule better than me sometimes.  Whether it's her innate personality trait or her being forced into being a helper early in life having twins as younger siblings and her just observing the help I needed, she is a caretaker to her siblings.  It's a nice balance to how mean she can be too, especially to Elise, at times....usually rooted from some kind of jealousy.  Lily continues to inhale books, is busy playing Tennis and going Rock Climbing these days.  Besides reading, she hasn't found something she's truly passionate about to the point that she just has to do it when not asked, but she is definitely still an enthusiast at the buffet of life.  Even though she wants to grow up so fast, I do love that she still runs up to me at school for a hug.  When I say goodnight to Lily, it's a always a tight hug but it's brief because she is usually in the middle of a book.



Elise Elise Elise.  Where do I start with Elise.  Should I start with the hidden candy wrappers inside a toilet paper roll (yes,it's what you're picturing) or all the notes she writes late at night ranging from poems to letters to me when she wants me to be nicer to her. Elise refuses to do any sort of competition whether it's a card game or a family fun run at school....yet I see her racing to the front door when she knows she'll be first to declare victory.  She doesn't hide her emotions.  Her sulking, sad, angry, and feeling guilty faces are at expert level.  The biggest cause of fights between Elise and Lily are over who gets what book.  Elise inhales books as well and she's a classic phonic learner which makes all the writing she does so much fun to read in her misspelled but phonetically correct thoughts.  Elise is in Girl Scouts and I'm trying to get her to try different activities to see if anything will stick.  She is a homebody which doesn't help.  Her idea of a fun time is brushing and playing with my hair while I read to her. She can easily play on her own and can get into a creative zone making costumes and cars out of anything she finds around the house.  When I say goodnight to her, she always says a sweet message to me in "Elise sign language."  



Paul's passion is sports.  I'll find him upstairs with his tennis racket and a foam ball playing tennis against the wall or kicking the soccer ball in the net over and over again. He wants me to play catch with him a lot.  It could be as simple as throwing socks to him while we're putting laundry away..."mom, just one more time, throw me the socks while I run and catch them."  Paul is a rule follower, helpful, and very tentative with taking on new challenges at first.  He prefers to play with someone instead of having alone time which is something I'm trying to work on.  He must always know the entire plan to every last detail before he'll give it a go.  He's very helpful to have around because his observation skills and attention to detail is very evident in his day to day.  He usually falls asleep first and has the best bedhead in the morning.  He seems to be a memory learner at least when it comes to spelling.  It's fun to give both Elise and Paul words to spell and Elise writes them phonetically and Paul is missing just one letter from his memory recollection.  Circle will be serkul by Elise and circl by Paul.  He is a jokester and his comedic timing is impressive.  All my kids make me laugh but there's something about his comedic timing and delivery that works so well.  When I say goodnight to Paul, he always wants a long hug, a kiss and the chance to play the highly competitive "I love you more than x" game. 



When I'm not on stay at home Mom household manager duty, boy am I enjoying my Nicole time.  I'm a very early riser and treasure the Nicole time in the mornings.  It is when I feel most productive and also when I'm at my kindest with myself.  Getting a long swim in or working on some mini project before the sun even rises is a good feeling.  I've made a conscious decision to not play competitive tennis this Fall on the two leagues I usually participate in to work on other interests.  I still need my tennis fix but it's now focused on what I love most about the sport which is getting run around the court by my tennis friends, giving lessons to one of my best friend's kids, and playing tennis with my own kids.  Being present with my family and friends and trying to be helpful within the community and my kid's school brings me much joy.  Gosh, my brother is just passing the 10 year mark since his cancer diagnosis and I always love his quick wit over text.  I'm so grateful for the medical marvels that exist to keep him doing well.   When you think from a perspective of gratitude, life really can feel good. Keeping it there 100% of the time is the tough part. Being active and aware also brings some serious frustrations with the homeless and Portland public schools (national level Politics is it's own blog post of emotions) that keep me up enough to question my decisions on a regular basis.   My inner demons (aka self critical nature and adulting/parenting woes) battle me every day.  Humor helps which is probably why I love listening to stand up comedy so much.  


One of Elise's hair do's


Nate is not a morning person.  He doesn't talk much about work but it consumes much of his mental capacity.  He finds his work challenging and stressful but thankfully secure. He does read obsessively from quality news, Michigan Football, to books of all genres.  We are very much on the same page when it comes to our thoughts on political and social issues.  He helps with Paul's soccer team these days and often tries to get his homebody girls and wife out the door to do more family adventures on weekends at least when there isn't a Michigan game on.  Nate still does the same sporting activities like running and biking but spends less time doing them compared to even 5 years ago because kid activities have ramped up.  He values his couple different regular boys nights for their random conversations and IPA's and still frequents concerts several times a year.  He continues to be the voice of logic and reason in our family.  He is currently the only member of the family that can separate logic from emotion.